Linda Kennedy
Britain’s Prince Charles has called for Highland Games to be included in PE classes at schools. PE stands for Physical Education; the Prince demonstrates spelling is already taught.
To those not raised in Scotland, Highland Games are gala days with brawn, where men tussle or turn to bagpipes for aerobic exertion. Many towns in the upper reaches of Scotland have their own Highland Games, preferably presented against a delightful background of hills. They are often thought to be a sweaty version of shortbread: something for the tourists.
Highland Games’ activities include:
Tossing the caber. A caber is a pole. It’s heavy and may be made from a larch tree.
The ‘Tug-o-War’. Two teams pull on a rope. Scottish gang warfare results in no knife or gun wounds, just blisters.
So, into this Highland swirl of activity, comes Prince Charles and his educational suggestion. The Prince of Wales, like many Royals, isn’t popular in Scotland. Some think he’s Welsh.
To others, Prince Charles ‘plays’ at Scotland. He comes up from London, wears a kilt, visits Balmoral, or Birkhall, his estate nearby. And calls in on the local Highland Games where, sitting inside a Harris tweed jacket, he gets ideas.
This particular Royal notion, the inclusion of Highland gaming in the school curriculum, raises questions. First, a suspicion. Is his food company, Duchy Originals, about to bring out a sports drink? Something like Pocari Sweat but tailored for the Wales family brand. Say, PrinceHarry Sweat.
Or does this eschew princely self-promotion, and is just a good idea? In recent years, fitness trends in Europe have looked outward for inspiration. Group exercise class, Body Combat, is martial arts set to music. And let’s not overlook a new trend, bungee fitness, which could arguably be claimed by New Zealand. (You’re strapped to the ceiling, and bounce through your routine.) And of course, there’s yoga. A straight swap for the cricket Britain introduced to India.
Is Prince Charles saying: why doesn’t one look within Britain for exercise inspiration? Brexit for the biceps, rather than immigrant exertions.
Sessions that could result from Highland Games might be:
Cardio Caber Tossing – a tree-trunk-based trapezius workout.
HIIT. High Intensity Interval Tug-o-War. Tug for an intense 30 seconds then rest.
Highland Aqua Zumba, in the puddles created by the inevitable Scottish deluge at some point during the Games.
Expanding the theme, in late summer, there might be a Glorious 12K, in homage to the start of the grouse shooting season on August 12th. The running route would be across the moors and guarantee fitness. When you heard gunfire, you would run fast.
I’m already wondering if all this has to be limited to school PE sessions. Group exercise classes in gyms are seeing potential in unexpected areas. There is now a class called POUND (and it’s not trying to improve sterling’s strength). It’s the ‘sweat-dripping, infectious fun’ of…drums. If exertion can be derived from drumming, surely activities linked to bagpiping also count?
One could dress for CardioCaber or High Intensity Interval Tug-of-War. The fashion for patterned gym leggings might extend to tartan lycra, enabling a Scottish athleisure brand to take on Lulu Lemon with a witty promotional campaign: ‘We’re flexible and Scottish.’ Usually anything made in Scotland is 100% stubborn.
I truly hope Prince Charles meant this suggestion – though proximity to April 1st, and a zany Royal sense of humour – both mean one has to retain an element of scepticism. Still, even if I am standing at the other end of the ‘Tug o War’ from the Prince, and shouting ‘pull the other one’, I’ll still be getting some exercise.
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